The Ant and The Grasshopper

****TRADITIONAL VERSION:

The ant works hard in the withering heat
all summer long,
building his house and laying up supplies for the
winter.

The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool
and laughs and dances
and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the ant is warm and well
fed. The grasshopper has
no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.

MORAL OF THE STORY: Be responsible for
yourself!



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MODERN VERSION

The ant works hard in the withering heat
all summer long,
building his house and laying up supplies for the
winter.

The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool
and laughs and dances
and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the shivering grasshopper
calls a press
conference and demands to know why the ant should be
warm and well fed
while others are cold and starving.

CBS, NBC, PBS, CNN, and ABC show up to
provide pictures of the
shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in
his comfortable home
with a table filled with food. America is stunned by
the sharp contrast.

How can this be, that in a country of
such wealth, this poor
grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?

Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and
everybody cries when they sing, 'It's Not Easy Being
Green.'

Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in
front of the ant's
house where the news stations film the grou p singing,
'We shall
overcome.' Jesse then has the group kneel
down to pray to God
for the grasshopper's sake.

Nancy Pelosi, John Kerry & Harry Reid
exclaim in an interview
with Larry King that the ant has gotten rich off the
back of the
grasshopper, and both call for an immediate tax hike
on the ant to make him
pay his fair share.

Finally, the EEOC drafts the Economic
Equity and
Anti-Grasshopper Act retroactive to the beginning of
the summer! The ant is
fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of
green bugs and, having
nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by
the government.

Hillary Clinton gets her old law firm to
represent the
grasshopper in a defamation suit against the ant, and
the case is tried
before a panel of federal judges that
Bill Clinton appointed
from a list of single-parent welfare recipients.
The ant loses the case.

The story ends as we see the grasshopper
finishing up the last
bits of the ant's food while the government house he
is in, which just
happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him
because he doesn't
maintain it.

The ant has disappeared in the snow.

The grasshopper is found dead in a drug
related incident and
the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of
spiders who terrorize
the once peaceful neighborhood.

MORAL OF THE STORY: Be very careful how
you vote in 2008

Take down the bird feeder!

I bought a bird feeder. I hung it on my back porch and filled it with seed. What a beauty of a bird feeder it is, as I filled it lovingly with seed. Within a week we had hundreds of birds taking advantage of the continuous flow of free and easily accessible food.
But then the birds started building nests in the boards of the patio, above the table, and next to the barbecue.

Then came the poop. It was everywhere: on the patio tile, the chairs, the table ... everywhere!

Then some of the birds turned mean. They would dive bomb me and try to peck me even though I had fed them out of my own pocket.
And others birds were boisterous and loud. They sat on the feeder and squawked and screamed at all hours of the day and night and demanded that I fill it when it got low on food.
After a while, I couldn't even sit on my own back porch anymore. So I took down the bird feeder and in three days the birds were gone. I cleaned up their mess and took down the many nests they had built all over the patio.
Soon, the back yard was like it used to be ... quiet, serene and no one demanding their rights to a free meal.

Now let's see .... Our government gives out free food, subsidized housing, free medical care, and free education and allows anyone born here to be an automatic citizen.
Then the illegals came by the tens of thousands. Suddenly our taxes went up to pay for free services; small apartments are housing 5 families; you have to wait 6 hours to be seen by an emergency room doctor; your child's 2nd grade class is behind other schools because over half the class doesn't speak English.
Corn Flakes now come in a bilingual box; I have to "press one" to hear my bank talk to me in English, and people waving flags other than "Old Glory" are squawking and screaming in the streets, demanding more rights and free liberties.
Just my opinion, but maybe it's time for the government to take down the bird feeder.

Running with the Bulls!

I always thought it would be fun to run with the Bulls......



I may rethink that!